Give a little time to me.

Aside from Mme, I think my mother is the most unreasonable woman on the face of the earth.

Yeah okay just pretend I didn’t say anything and continue on a conversation with yourself. 

I just want everything to make sense to me. I want the answers, I want to know what to choose, who to choose, what to do with my life. I just want, for the first time ever, for everything to just fall into place and work. I want to know what you’re thinking and what they’re thinking and why I don’t have the guts to just say what I’m thinking and I just want… whatever it is I want, because at this point, I don’t even know.  Always unsettled. Always paranoid. Always confused.

So bored of people. So annoyed.

I’m not grateful enough. I never show my appreciation to people when I should. But when people are there for me, it really does mean the world to me. So thank you, kind souls.

Overwhelmed. Decisions. Plans. And it all leads to leaving. And I need to say something. But I don’t know how. 

I can’t maintain a conversation anymore. I just lose interest too quickly. I guess I’m not angsty enough for everyone. I don’t talk about serious stuff about myself to anyone anymore. Because somehow the conversation always becomes about the other person and then what am I supposed to do? So I just stop trying to pretend to be a sad person because I’m not. I’ll just sit here and think thoughts like this to myself because no one is listening and I don’t really want them to. I’m not even bitter. That wasn’t sarcasm, by the way. I’m not. I simply go about life doing what I do.

Things that irk me: When people constantly ask me why I didn’t apply to this college or that college… OH OKAY WHY DIDN’T YOU JUST APPLY TO EVERY SCHOOL IN THE COUNTRY HUH.